Thursday, April 8, 2010

Well, I guess it is time to write the next chapter. The past two weeks have been rather frustrating. The all knowing doctors don't seem to understand that when one has this diagnosis hanging over one's head it would be nice to make things happen faster. But, oh well. On Monday I had another appointment with the regular surgeon. I wasn't quite sure what the appointment was for since it was only scheduled for 20 minutes. When I got there and after the usual "please take everything off from the waist up" they came in and said that they wanted me to sign all of the permission papers and to get all of the pre-op things done. That meant blood work, EKG, and chest X-ray. I was a little nervous about the chest X-ray since last week on top of everything else I had a bad case of bronchitis. I have never had bronchitis in my life, and it seemed odd since I had not had a cold. I just had this nagging cough for several weeks and my voice was very low and sexy. But they put me on high powered antibiotics and I licked it quite fast, except for the hanging on of coughing up disgusting stuff. But I guess I am cured. When I inquired about a surgery date they said it would probably be sometime next week, maybe April 14 or 15, but they would call me. Today is Thursday and they finally called. It has been really hard to plan my life. Especially since people were calling wanting business appointments next week and I couldn't commit to anything. But as of today the surgery will be next Thursday, April 15. Tax day. I seem to have this thing about the 15th. Last year on March 15 I was having an emergency appendectomy. This year on March 15th I was having both breasts biopsied. Now on April 15 I will be having a bilateral mastectomy. Next year there will be no March or April 15. I intend to just skip right over it. It is actually a great relief to have this scheduled. Now I can quit worrying and just get on with life for the next few days.
The other big traumatic thing was to go wig shopping yesterday with two of my best friends. Pam has already been through the cancer thing with surgery, chemotherapy and losing ones hair. Linda has been with me through thick and thin of pregnancies and losing babies. Her usual comment is "we can do this" and "it's a piece of cake". That's what she told me about having a C-section when Laura was born. After coming to in the recovery room and feeling like a mack truck had driven through my body, I don't believe a word that she says to me about something being "a piece of cake". Anyway, Pam and I drove down to Laguna Niguel yesterday to shop for a wig before my hair falls out. I have already cut it short. I must say it is a surreal experience. I put on one wig that we were looking at for style only. It was blond. As I sat there looking at myself in the mirror I was staring at my sister, Nancy. I have never thought we looked alike, but, Oh my. Nancy was staring back at me. I guess we really are related! Anyway, it is very humbling to think about going bald. First they are going to take away my boobs. Next they are going to take away my hair. And I have been told I might have to get rid of my nails. What is a girl to do?!? But, I did buy a wig. Hopefully I won't have to wear it for a while.
To make matters worse, Steve and I, along with Michael, have been planning a trip to Europe for many months. We were to leave on April 23 and return on May 8. Needless to say, I am not going to Europe. I have insisted that Steve and Michael go. And as it turns out Shannon will be taking my place. My only demand is that I get a trip to Paris, France when all of this is over. I will have earned it. Since they will be leaving a week after I have this surgery, my mother is coming down to sunny California to take care of me for a week, and then Laura will come down. It would be nice to be able to do something while they are here, but that probably is not going to happen. I have been told that I will not be able to do anything with my arms for about two weeks, so they will have to wait on me hand and foot. Maybe I should try to enjoy it. One doesn't often get that kind of service. But I will be grateful for all the help I can get.
I am so overwhelmed by all of the telephone calls, cards, e-mails and general conversations of concern. I have had people all over Utah and California putting my name in the temple. I am so grateful for all of the prayers and kind words of encouragement. I know that I will be fine. I just have to get through this little rough patch. So, stay tuned for the next installment.


  1. I can't think of anybody who could fight this better than you! We're praying for you here.

  2. Ditto what Jana said. You're in our prayers every night (and on the NC temple roll - you're making your way across the country!).

  3. Yes, isn't it cool to be blonde? The boys thought the same thing when I came home from the hair dresser with a different style one time--"You look like aunt Janet, only blonde". Thinking of you, sis. You're my hero!

  4. Hey,you could have been blonde like me! Thinking of you! xoxoxo